In Forgiving & Moving On

Dear friend,

Praised be Jesus and Mary!

“Move on,” a good friend told me. I asked him how, but he refused to answer me. He said that I need to figure it out on my own. I got my answer yesterday.

When bad or sad events happen in our lives, the only way to move forward is to let go and move on. It may sound very simple, but to me it is something that is difficult to understand. HOW? Just HOW do we move on?

Let me give two scenarios:

Poor grades. How can I move on from the feeling of getting unsatisfactory grades? Shall I simply forget about it and study harder next time? Shall I pause for a while and evaluate my study habits?

Love (a.k.a. brokenheartedness, haha). Must I stop communicating with him? Shall I pretend nothing happened and just act cool like good old friends? Shall I go cut my hair short or binge eat?? Hahahaha!!

The answer to the question “How do we move on” is “forgiveness”.

I can try to forget my poor grades and change my style of studying. But, first, I must forgive myself for getting low grades. I need to admit and accept my mistakes and shortcomings and misfortunes(?), and forgive myself. Only then can I move on.

The same principle applies in moving on from brokenheartedness, except that I need to forgive another person aside from myself.

God is a forgiving father and He doesn’t remember our previous offences. In yesterday’s Gospel (Mt. 18:21-25a,27-28a,29-30,32-33), Jesus said that we need to learn to forgive.

Fr. Manny, in his homily, explains that we forgive for God’s sake, for the offender’s sake AND also for our own sake. We need to learn to forgive, and that our forgiveness should be constant and available.

The word “forgive” comes from the words “give before.” It means that we need to give forgiveness even before the offender says sorry. This is not the easiest thing to do, and I am very guilty about this. What if the other person is not at all sorry? Yes. Still, we need to forgive… for own’s sake, too, because we need to move on… we need to heal… and we want peace in our hearts and minds.

These are the three reasons which Fr. Manny presented on why we forgive:

To be able to move on,

To heal,

For your own peace.

That’s all folks. So, now… move on!


Kristine G. Veneracion

Source: Fr. Manny’s homily. 02 March 2016.

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